Yesterday, after shopping at H&M at Express Avenue Mall, I thought I’ll check out ThakurDas Choithram. It was 8 minutes away by walk, and on the main mount road. So off I headed, towards there. However, once I took the right towards LIC, on the mount road, it was almost like it was a different zone. It was darker. Only handicraft stores were there, and much emptier. I was feeling quite a bit uncomfortable walking there, though it said it was just a 3 minute walk away.

I found the shop, and understandably, I didn’t like it very much.

It wasn’t well lit, it didn’t have air-conditioning working and it was after a lonely walk. That was enough to put me off, though they had rolls and rolls of gorgeous fabric, which I normally love to browse through. I left  quickly without buying anything.

It was just 7:00 pm. Not even late in the night.

It wasn’t a pleasant experience.

You know what the funny part is? I didn’t tell this to my boy friend yesterday, because I knew he’d not be happy with me walking alone in dark places – even if it’s in the main road. Just like the time when a guy on the road who was coming in the wrong way (on a motorbike), picked a fight with me (in a car) for his mistake. That guy, within minutes had 2 others speaking up for him, and questioning my driving skills, and giving nothing but support to the one who was clearly in the wrong. If it had been a guy driving the car, they would have decently apologized and the matter would have ended. They wouldn’t have had to be insulted loudly on the road, like I was.

My boyfriend’s reservations are  justified though, just like my instinctive fears. Fears I’ve not felt while walking through darker alleys, later in the evening, in other countries. Anyone who knows Chennai’s mount road would know that I’m not even close to talking about actual darkness, just darker as opposed to well lit, crowded locations.

The society here, the environment is just not supportive or conducive for women.

Physical and sexual violences against women are becoming increasingly common – and the victimization is starting from younger and younger ages – as my friend and I were talking yesterday. We agreed that sexual violences are not restricted to India. Far from. It is prevalent in most countries. 

What makes in worse for India though?

The focus is on the crime, how it was committed, where and why. There is even focus on the medical injuries that ensued. But there is little to no focus on the justice doled out to the instigators, to the assaulters, on the rapists or those who rag. The punishment is not clearly advertised. In many cases, it is not given till too late.

The excessive focus on the crimes, and the minimal focus on the justice system they have deal with is making such violences popular for all the wrong reason. Those are the real dark alleys now. Alleys which need to be better lit up.

This is not just the fault of the justice system. 

The media has an essential role in this as well.

News channels need to sensationalize the justice when it is given out, and also make more shows about how such evil doers are hunted down by the police. It’s the justice system that needs to be brought to the spot light to reduce the violences.

When will women safely walk where men walk?

When the figurative alleys are well lit as required. 

Rock-a-bye baby

Isn't being rocked gently a lovely feeling?

I imagine it is.

The last memory of being rocked to sleep is from when I was a little girl (as described in THIS post). I've been a big girl since and fallen asleep by myself.

However, the next best thing I suppose is being sung to sleep. I have a host of tiny babies around me in varying levels of baby metrics (I'm going to dedicate a post to baby metrics) - one thing common across them all is that I instinctively start singing to them when I want to calm them down. It works many times, doesn't work sometimes.

The tiny humans are probably wondering why I make strange noises directed at them I suppose. Last evening I was spending some time with one of those tiny humans - she's still shy of three months, and one of two things is going to happen to her; She's either going to continue to be really talkative, or she's going to be all talked out soon. For a little thing that can't make words yet, boy she talks a lot. Baby language of course. She spoke so much that I even forgot about my song. I was just trying to decipher what she was coming to say. She did pause to stare at the fan though. Of course, those are the most amusing things invented. I used that gap to sing to her, and she started laughing away. Was it me or the fan that amused her so? I wouldn't know.

Singing together is a happy feeling. I've been lucky to have a sister who sings amazingly, and (more importantly) sings with me. That's something about home that I love. Hearing a song, and continuing it from the next room. Granted she's accused me of making her forget many songs - and also, she remembers my composition of baby songs better than me.

My boyfriend and I, who are in a cross-continental long distance relationship also sing together sometimes. We're on the phone, doing different things, and singing the same song. One day, when he was being very indulgent of me, and I guess in a very good mood, he readily agreed when I casually asked him to sing me to sleep.

Being sung to is such a happy feeling. So calming.
That day, he had a whole playlist of songs ready for me. Yes not all of them would qualify as bedtime songs - I think he even threw in a few raps in between - however, that night, I gently drifted off to sleep with the phone on my ear. Almost better than being rocked to sleep :)


P.S: Such a random haphazard yet happy post right? Well, that's how I'm feeling now :D
Sometimes, who cares if the nursery rhymes seem a little violent? So what if the cradle drops or jill tumbles? As long as the children singing them are happy :)
Who cares if the fairy tales have been romanticised now? We could use lesser gruesome stories all around, thank you!

Love Everlasting

There are somethings you can’t explain

Like the love you’re already into

Never truly knowing, when it began

Knowing for certain you can always go to

I don’t know when it began

It’s been so very long

Don’t how or what or why

I just have a happy sigh

All that I have now is the warmth

The afterglow

Sometimes, little flames erupt

However true happiness lies,

In knowing that the embers are everlasting

Today, when I was almost through

Came right down to the end of the interaction

I put that last chocolatey cone of ice cream in

And remembered again

Not just the warmth,

Of love everlasting

But that happy gooey sappy smiley feeling

Of love alive