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Balance

I get married in less than 50 days.

Wow. It's finally happening.

Last weekend, I asked my dad how he was feeling about it - he for one has been waiting for this day for almost a decade, me being his first daughter and all. He said he's ready for it. Haha. So like him.

I'm not sure if he is truly ready for life after I leave, but that's just us kids, we always worry about our parents.

People ask me if I am ready for it? Am I getting cold feet? Am I nervous?

The answers are: Have been since that day last year when I stood next to him, and the only thing I felt was absolute glee. No way. And hell yes.

Why so nervous you ask? Because I am yet to sort out my reception dress. My tailor is bailing on me, and my designer friend who was travelling is now not well. This portion of my wedding is totally jinxed I tell you.

As for cold feet - not even a little bit. More than ever before (yes, despite the occasional hiccups) I know that B is the best thing that happened to me, and I…

Beading the Veil - Gossamer Veil Part 2

Aloha!

It's a veil. It's a piece of see-through fabric that was originally meant to cover the bride's face. Now it's rarely used to cover the face, and used more as an accessory. There - I've honestly admitted it.

Accessories however, can be a simple supporting statement to the main look or could be a statement themselves.

I wanted a simple Veil. With a little bit of shimmer of course. You probably know more about that from here.
My first experience with the Veil was when I went to a wedding dress store to try out one of their dresses, and the stylist clipped on a veil on my head to finish the look.
Boy does it finish the look!

The veil instantly upgrades a girl in a pretty dress to a Bride. 
I should have known then. I should have known that the Veil wouldn't be content being a simple accessory.

So now that I had the perfect Veil in the perfect colour, you'd think I'd be happy? Well I was, but it needed a little something more. Pearl beads.

I love bead…

Far away for Far too long

How long is too long?

A day? A week? A month? six? A year?

500 days.

That's how long our long distance relationship is.

1.5 years.

If you think it's long, it feels longer.

The saddest part is the forgetting. Forgetting of how he smells, or how tall he is when he stands next to me, the warmth of his hand against my shoulder. Forgetting how it feels to hold hands or be enveloped in that hug.

There are other hurdles too - time difference. Oh so confusing!! And of course difficult to find free times that overlap.

The biggest hurdle is not knowing the expression of the other person. Thirteen times out of Forteen, I have no idea what his face is saying in parallel to the words I hear, or the silences I feel. Even in the one time we video call every week, it's oh-so-easy to hide your face casually, away from the small front camera, away from the small phone screen.

We prepared for this a lot though. We made a list of 50 things we'd do together over the year to stay connected.…

Gossamer Veil

The Veil – part 1
The Wedding Veil. A delicate thing that makes one think of words like Gossamer – words I have no clue about the meaning of. Gossamer and Fairy Dust.
When you have a long time to plan a wedding (I don’t mean the years that passed by, I mean the year and a half that I have between my engagement and my wedding) there are many things that change over time.
My dress for example, which I got months back, now has a longer train amongst many other upgrades. Wait, that’s for a later post!
When I started planning my wedding look, my veil played a very small part in it. I had decided to just get some plain white tulle, add a ribbon on the edges, and DIY it. That plan met with an immediate facelift when I found glittery tulle instead of a plan one! Yaay! [Closer to Gossamer in my head – whatever that could mean ;) ]
However, that plan was shooed away in an eye blink when I saw the most gorgeous Cathedral length Veil hanging at a shop in China. The lace work on it’s side was …

Husband

Image
A Married Man or Male Partner in a marriage.
I am going to be married in less than 4 months! Every time I think about it, I seem to have lesser time. So either I think about it too less, or time is shrinking. (I’ll leave those in the know to eye roll or smirk as they please)
The closer we get to December, the more I find people asking me “What is your Husband-to-be” doing, or something else about him.
I was very comfortable with him as my boyfriend. Then, he was my friend, confident and equal in every right.
Then he became my fiancé. After some initial adjustments, I got used to having a fiancé as well. That’s when he truly became my person. He was still my friend and confidant. However, he also became a person who could take liberties with me, give me advise and vice versa. He also became an integral part of my support system and someone whose opinion was needed, not just mattered. Now, or soon, he will be my husband.
That sounds so much heavier as a relationship definition tho…

Jump

One of the cool things we are taught to do when swimming is to jump into the deep end of the pool. Not dive. Just jump, leg first, body straight.

We go straight down till we touch the ground - holding our breaths, then we automatically kind of pop up - like a balloon held under water. Once we pop up, we've got to continue swimming.

I love this jumping thing.

The first few times I kind of fell on the water instead of jumping, and I was also keeping my eyes shut. The masters kept telling me to keep my eyes open - I was wearing goggles anyway! That's when I really started enjoying this.

You have to let yourself really be aware of the process to feel it. You should consciously not let it be a blur. Then you will catch what my favourite moment is - the part where you give the outside world the slip, and get under water. Then the light is different, things slow down under water, your body feels different, and for that brief moment, you're a creature of the water. You land on the…

E for Engaged

I’m Engaged!
I said yes ;)
So this is part of CBC’s ABC Challenge, and I’ve been thinking all day for what to write for E. I even asked a friend hoping she’d give ideas, but no luck. I was almost going to write a random essay on Elephants when it so happened that a classmate of mine from Grad School Created an all girls group for our batch. It’s been 8 years since I graduated, and it’s almost like we’re getting to know each other all over again. Most are married with kids, and when I was introducing myself, I said I’m engaged.
That led to so much excitement. More than pictures of the kids the girls shared! “Aaaawwww” and variations of the same was the general reaction.
Got me wondering about what I feel about being Engaged.
This time each year (around his birthday), since I’ve graduated, my dad starts a familiar saga – “We got to get you married before May 10th (My Birthday)” It’s his inevitable and inexplicable hope to get me married – a last ditch attempt to get me married at what…