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Trippin, Flipping, Stumbling still Bubbling!! - 2017 what a year you were!

Sunday, December 31, 2017

Whoa! It's time again for a review of a year that was post! And, what a year it was!!!

2017 subtly, gently but surely nudged me out of my comfort zone in so many ways.

I did travel as much as I would have liked to, but almost none of them were alone. 5 domestic - Fort Kochin, Pondicherry, Wagamon, Tirunelveli and Mumbai (the one day trip - the only one I went alone on) and 1 international - China. Most surprisingly (probably only to myself) I immensely enjoyed the different kinds of company I had on each of those trips, and even feel that I wouldn't have liked/ enjoyed/ covered half as much had I been alone! Be it covering all the exhibits of the Art Biennale which I definitely wouldn't have done without my companion, Figuring our way through a foreign land, not knowing the language, feeling lost - that day, if it hadn't been for my friend who was able to keep a cool head, I would have broken down for sure or Lying in a tent on a hill that's almost where the clouds as the sky cracked open and poured down on us, as a girl friend and I giggled and laughed at our love stories, with no care about the downpour outside.

I was given incremental roles at work - things that required me to learn SO much more than I would have ever imagined, and more importantly, about things that I once believed were so far out of my scope of interest. If you'd told me just a couple of years back that I would be writing statement of works for drill kits, vices and what not (with the help of an engineer of course) and be able to do basic repairs in 3D printers, I'd have said you're high on imagination - but well here I am!
At the end of the day, as challenging as it was, I completely enjoy it!

Serious relationship! Now this one was and is a roller coaster - but I'm not alone, and hence it's so much fun! Yes I've been in relationships before. Even this relationship started last year, but it was just this year - almost starting from a conversation we had on January first, did the seriousness sink in. What initially seemed almost impossible is now a beautiful reality.
Long distance relationship - I've got a year of that left, so I'm going to just say that as long as there's enough love, it's not as bad I expected it to be at all!

Writing fantasy - this one was a pleasant surprise! I actually started working on my fantasy novel last year. I wrote about 5000 words then and paused. I realized this year that I was trying to extrapolate too much from my life experience and had to let that go. The world that opened up post that is extraordinary! I hope I do it justice in 2018 :)

All this, however, would not have been ever possible without the support system I had!
My family - old and new who have been sweet and great, My friends - they're rock solid and the best ever, My team - Best team ever!

Now moving on to some of my favorite moments of 2017:


  1. Getting engaged. Funnily enough, the engagement of July 5th sunk in for me only on September 4th. ;)
  2. The great wall of China, making it to there by train. Watching the sunset from there. Being there when it was pretty much empty - just about 5 others were there, and having a marvel and greatness of the endless wall sink in. That was fabulous!
  3. Holding the hands of the tiny, minutes (less than an hour old) daughter of my close friend, after having stayed with her through the labor, calculating the time between contractions and waiting in front of the labor room. That's an experience that cannot fully be described! Got to mention that I went for a walk with the mother just the evening before :) 
  4. Getting a phone as a gift from my sister! The little thing is all grown up, earning and even giving expensive gifts!!! Time flies. Proud moment :)
  5. Getting picked up to go to a certain dinner by a certain someone. I had decided against going to that dinner because I didn't know them too well. However, I was picked up, and taken and made to feel at home. That car ride still makes me smile :)
  6. Sitting on a cliff somewhere in Wagamon, watching the clouds pass by below and the sunrise above, as the plot of what happens in a world created within my head came to life 
  7. Getting paati a new earring with Jeffy. It's sweet how proud grannies are of being gifted by her grandchildren.
  8. Sitting on a swing and catching up with a friend of mine after almost 5 years. That was happiness. 
  9. Meeting my team face to face in China this year :D
  10. Craft - This year I crafted a lot of things beyond just dream catchers. It's been a whole load of fun. I hope I continue to do so!

Biggest regrets of 2017:
  1. Mixing friends and money - lesson learnt: DON'T
  2. Not going to Vascos for lunch :( I don't know why I don't do some things that I want to so badly sometimes
  3. Putting on weight *cries*
  4. Not writing more
  5. Not taking better care of myself. Be it dressing up or staying fit. 
Hopes for 2018:
  1. To not get lost in the vortex of wedding planning. Still have a wedding I enjoy.
  2. To finish writing ATU
  3. Go to at least one new country (please please please Travel Gods)
  4. Find the gentle balance between Us and Me in relationships
  5. Learn to wear make up
  6. 58

If you stayed on to read all the way till here - Big hug and thank you :)
I hope you had an amazing year as well!
Do share a memory of your year here if you like :)

See you in 2018 ❤

When the bough breaks, the cradle will fall

Friday, December 15, 2017

There are earthquakes, prime ministers and presidents rocking this world.
However, here I sit, quietly mourning two trees a hundred miles away, that stand no more.

My home in most of my dreams, almost till just a few years ago is the not house I stay in now - where I've stayed for the better part of the last fifteen or so years. It's my grandmother's house where my sister and I have spent almost all our summer holidays. Through my schooling days, Christmas or Summer meant a long vacation spent in the sprawling one storey house with a roof top that was the perfect place for run and catch, badminton, star gazing, watching the sun set, hopscotch, ... we were young and the possibilities were endless.
The house also boasted of a small water tank that doubled up as a kiddy pool, which we did grow out of - and an amazing garden.
The best part of the garder were two huge- and I mean Huuuggeee Chikku trees. We've climbed them, we've relished its fruits for days, we've played endless games with the seeds of the fruits and we were more under the shade of those trees than we were inside the house when the sun was up.

It was under those trees that we were fed – distracted by the music of birds.
It was the sound of a mynah that sat in those trees that my mother could perfectly emulate. We’d listen in awe and ask her to whistle that little tune over and over again, wondering how she ever did it. Trying in vain to copy her, having only air blow out, no matter how we tried to twist our lips and mouths.

When my sister was still a baby, and I was quite small, my grandma used to tie two sarees to the branch of one of the trees - the one closer to the side entrance of the house. We would both have a swing each. The saree was then padded with a layer of seat cushion and we would lie in it. My mother or grandmother would tie a rope to the two make shift swings, and keep tugging at the from where she sat – swaying us gently.
It was in the shade of that tree that I had my first and only pet – a little baby chick, which was stolen away by an eagle from the shade of the same tree. I cried for days.

As we grew, it was under those trees that we played house – with miniature kitchen utensils, big hopes and friends from all around the neighbourhood. As we grew, make shift swings of cloth couldn’t hold us anymore. The sarees tore and gave way. That sadness was shortlived however, as our grandmother knew our priorities and had a big sturdy table converted into a swing.
This swing was like a boat for us. Tied up to a tall branch of the tree by four strong iron linked chains, we could both now swing at the same time. We grew leaving behind kiddish things like playing house, and moved on the board games that we could play right on the swing.
The swing would make a rhythmic tung-tong noise – hearing which meant that the swing is in motion and the other is to join immediately.
This big swing was wide and strong enough to even hold my mother and grandmother at the same time. Those fat chains could easily support us as we leant on it. Three of us would sit there playing UNO or Bluff for hours.
Some afternoons, we’d nap on it – it had cushion and life was perfect.
It was on that swing one of those swings that I first fell in love – with Mr.Darcy, and more importantly, with reading itself. My favourite authors changed from Jane Austen to J K Rowling to L M Montgomery, but the love for the swing never changed.

However, time went on, life got in the way, we stopped going back there for holidays so much. The swing used to always be there on the tree for us, as long as we went back with my mother to her childhood home.

Eventually, the holidays spent there became just long weekends spent there. One day she passed on … we took her back there from the city we lived in, and after everything was done, I remember sitting on those steps that she used to sit in and wonder why they had taken down the swing. The trees were still a comfort, and a familiar climb – so I could find a big branch to climb on to.

More than ten years have passed since then.
The house changed in a million ways, that I almost don’t recognize it anymore. But the trees were as familiar as breathing. As close as last year, when we’d gone there, my sister, father and I were all climbing and hanging off those branches continuing like we always used to.

Last Monday, I found out that those trees were no more. I’ve been trying to write this since then, but I needed to tribute the happy parts and not just mourn their loss.
Out of the many things we take for granted, and only remember when we’ve already lost them and it’s too late – those trees will be. A childhood under those shades and the wind made softer by them.
I’m glad they were a part of my life. I didn’t realize how important a role they played till now. I hope every child in the world has a tree to play around.

Down will come baby, cradle and all

Wednesday, December 13, 2017

Have you heard the lullaby "Rock a bye baby?"
It's a very soft and sweet melody.
The softness and sweetness stop there, however. If you closely listen to the lyrics, you'll understand that it's actually quite a violent and sadistic song.

The lyrics go like this:

Rock-a-bye, baby, in the tree top
When the wind blows the cradle will rock
When the bough breaks the cradle will fall
Down will come baby, cradle and all
I've been having a crazy week at work. Another one of those weeks where I ended up feeling proud for not actually saying out loud things that I was thinking.

I woke up this morning not feeling rested at all. Having traveled both nights the last weekend, and having a busy Monday and Tuesday was not fun. My first thoughts were about the vendor I had to confront because he had given me just 15% of the items I had ordered, confused some of those orders as well, and forever gave me the "Working on it" story. There was no morning letter waiting for me. Added to that, my morning book currently is a Danielle Steel - Journeys, which covers physical and verbal domestic abuse. So obviously, by 7:00 am, I was ready to crawl back into bed, and sleep for a week or so.

There are some days which you know are going to be so bad. However, nothing has happened yet.
It's like lying in the damn cradle hung on breaking branch. You may be swinging on it, staring at the branch as it breaks little by little. Knowing that it's just going to get worse. Somedays they just do. Unavoidable impending doom.

There's no point in fighting even. Moving or shaking when lying in such a cradle will only break that bough faster. So you just let it go. Wait for it to be done with. The damage done can be assessed after the crash and fall has happened.

The crazy thing about these kind of days is, it all comes down on you at one shot. Before it does though, it's quite comfortable - in a way - the wind might be blowing, the cradle might be rocking, it might be the perfect kind of moment to softly drift away into sleep or watch the butterflies flutter around you.
Like hey, another delivery I expected tomorrow is coming early!

On the other hand, you have that feeling at the back of your neck - things are going to go wrong. Will the bough break? How far am I from the ground? Will the broken branch fall right on me, and will it fall away? It could even fall searing into me. Maybe I'm just a foot or so above ground, maybe I can roll away quickly?

Unfortunately, you'll only know when it has already happened.

Christmas Wish List

Wednesday, December 6, 2017

A few days ago, a friend of mine asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I have amazing friends :D Yaayy gifts! However, I thought and thought, and came up blank.
Over the last few days, as I've been setting things aside to prepare for the season, I thought and thought some more. Still nothing.

In a way that's awesome. I think I have reached a point in life where I have everything!

[Unless you're taking into account not having a Porsche, A beautiful house of my own, That promotion I've been waiting for, That Gucci Watch, Six month long Euro Trip, Already published novel .... you get the drift]

Getting back on track, I guess I already have things that most people wish for. And I'm so very grateful for it :)

Then again, it is the season for giving (ergo, also receiving) so it's better to clear about what we want sometimes, rather than getting what we don't want. I went to the extent of checking for nice gift ideas, that I can ask for myslef :P Still came up with squat. Actually it did help me come up with a list of things I don't want .

[No Jewelry organizers / bags / headphones/ pillows/ clothes/ Green tea infusers / stationery (yes, I'm actually saying that! Have too much, and use too little)/ Books (same story, too many unread books in my shelf) / Baking Stuff/ Phone cases/ Plants/ Car stuff/ ,,,]

If push comes to shove, there are a few things I do want (Hey, I'm human!)

  1. Lipstick (I haven't found the perfect shade yet, still hunting)
  2. Brunch at Vascos, Hilton (That's my favourtitest still)
  3. White Stilletos with bling  (If you've guessed it, yes, that's exactly why I want it)
  4. A nice lamb pie recipe and the ingredients to make it :P
  5. Off White Tulle with work - lots of it. 5 metres of it! (I'm mostly kidding on this one. I just keep wondering about it a lot these day, so) Got it from China :D
  6. Swimming Classes

That's all I could think of :) 

I noticed (myself) that the list is becoming shorter, but pricier. Guess it's a sign that I've moved on to a different stage in life :)

What's your Christmas wish list?

Have you been good, so Santa can visit?


A very Merry Christmas Season!






Don't waver so much my dear

Monday, December 4, 2017

My dear friend who is in that on-again-off again relationship,

I love you, please remember that.

Unfortunately, I haven’t brought myself to tell this to you directly (yet). I hope I get around to it.
Though I have been absolutely supportive of your relationship so far, I’m starting to doubt that decision.

You guys have been in your relationship for more than a year now. Through that period, you haven’t spent more than two full months together continually before resorting to “It’s over dude, we broke up” and consequently going on to patch up over the next week or so.

You guys should just make up your mind on whether to make things work or to just let go. Your approach of two steps forward and one step back won’t take you far. More importantly, it can’t sustain.

You see darling, if non-commitment is so easily an option for the both of you, you’re never giving time for the glue to set. Your relationship is like a beautiful vase broken to pieces, and both of you refusing to cement it as you’re just waiting for the next crack. You’re using fevistick which sticks paper at best. You can’t be in a relationship thinking “Let’s see how far this goes.” Unless you’re in for a fling, which I know you’re not, this approach will not work. You cannot test waters forever. There’s so much more to it. Keeping one foot pointed toward the exit door which is forever open will strain you, and eventually kill the relationship.

So please my love, make up your mind. Both of you. Decide to go through with it fully or give it up. Don’t be in the relationship constantly wondering how long it’ll last. It will break your faith in relationships. Don’t have leaving as an option if you choose to stay. Give it your best. Give it your all. If not, leave right away and see how to move on.

I say this because I care,

Yours always,

Someday’s Dreamer
 
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