Love...From what I've seen and understand

When we're 16 to 19
Falling in love is like a reckless dive. We give it our all - heart and soul.
Though it is a time when we're learning to define ourselves away from our parents, Love at that time is more of a support system than a defining factor. It's our first step beyond the boundary.
At that age, it's beautiful, it's completely for the present, and almost like there ain't no grey.
The heart is given a free reign.

When we're young adults - 19 to 30
A time of life when almost everything is about the future. Love is too.
We evaluate people based on how well they will be a match for us, and how good a company they would be in the future. We don't want to give it our all, but most of us wouldn't have perfected restraint in a relationship. Because of that, it is passionate.
It is a war between the mind and the heart.
For some, the mind rules. For some, the heart rules. A rare precious few find the perfect balance. The rest just waddle in the pool between one end and the other- often taking many laps.

When we hit middle age
We've found stability... if not in our lives, at least mentally.
Love isn't a want, just a basic need. It doesn't have to be passionate, companionship means more.
Restraint is perfected with or without practice. It isn't about the past, present or future exactly. It is more about one's understanding of one self, over his past and present. Evaluations of the future is not about - will my partner contribute to it or hinder it, rather, will my partner fit into it.
Here, the mind rules the heart. They learn the balance between themselves.


And then there are some others like me, to whom love is a book or a video, read or watched, enjoyed from a distance, for the amusement they provide. And maybe dreaming of a someday when the umbrella is held over two heads instead of one.