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The return of the moon, the wait of the waves.

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

This is another version of a previous post, written as soon as I got home :)



I went to the beach yesterday, after a long time ... with my dad .
the time we were there, almost entirely, he was engrossed in his phone conversations, and me with the water ... we walked parallelly though. Him on the sand, me on the water.
It was a new moon day, the waves were furious. I personally think they just missed the moon too much, I thought is was kind of sweet, how charmingly they do it with all their dignity !
So there I was walking , my dad and me occasionally exchanging smiles, waves and holding hands when I go to drier areas ...
It felt peaceful. I knew he was there , right there for me :)
and I totally, completely loved and trusted him.
Of course, I wouldn't tolerate the same behaviour from my boy friend (if he were around :P) The funny part is... I was thinking about it, I wouldn't have minded it from a husband ( God forbid I have one ! )
Double standards, you ask ? Well ... not really ... it's just a sense of security, which one failed relationship did not help enhance ( ;) )
The funniest part is ... I'm scared of getting that comfortable with anyone ... too much trust always meant too much power to hurt. Even the unintentional actions ... and the worst ... if they were to leave you.
With me, I know it will be complete, if and when it happens. (fingers crossed for it not happening! ) So it'll be all the more worse ( now you know why my fingers are crossed )
Would you willingly give someone else that much power to hurt ?
Or can you actually trust them completely and say they wouldn't ?

I wish I could be as sure of it as they waves were of the moon's return ... and yet they thrash so violently ....

2 comments:

Sriganesh said...

I must commend that your expectations are very practical. And I can assure you that they will be fulfilled.

Boyfriend will hold your hands and yourself as if he will never leave you in life. Husband on the other hand will...

Someday's dreamer said...

will ..... ? :)

 
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